Nothing Compares

It has been a little while since I've written and I can honestly say that I've missed it a lot. Derek and I have been on vacation and I've been a little preoccupied.

This trip truly has been a blessing. It is the trip I've always dreamed of. We flew into San Diego stayed there for two days,  drove up to LA for three days,  and made the long drive up the coast to San Francisco where we have spent the last four days. We have done some really fun things including the San Diego zoo, visiting many beaches, going to Universal Studios, shopping, visiting Alcatraz,  seeing a baseball game (although I'm really not a fan), and eating some really delicious food. While all of these things have been great, the best part has been having fun and laughing again with Derek. I love the way that man can make me laugh.

It has been such a needed and refreshing time away, but there have definitely been difficult moments. Going to the zoo was much harder than anticipated. There were families with small infants everywhere.  We also celebrated our second wedding anniversary on Monday. It was fun to celebrate (especially in California), and Derek was very sweet and took me shopping and to a beach to make the day extra special for me. If you know Derek at all, you understsnd how much he must love me to spend time on our anniversary shopping and tanning. I am so thankful for him. But the day was still difficult. Many times I thought that we should be tending to the needs of a seven week old baby girl, not laying on a beach in Santa Monica.

Seeing families with small children on this trip has also been really hard. I often found myself wondering if we will ever be lucky enough to be *that* family with small children on vacation. I desperately long for that to be us one day.

It also seems that 2014 is the year of baby girls. Every family with young infants seemed to have girls. At first I thought that maybe I was just noticing girls more often, but trust me - I notice every single baby that we walk past. What has been the most surprising though,  is the amount of people who have the same stroller system we have. It must be a really popular brand in the States because everyone and their brother seem to have it. I often found myself with a very envious heart,  that desperately longs to be pushing Brooklyn in her stroller and placing her in her car seat. I should be that mama feeding her baby on a bench by the water, and fixing her cute little headband that is falling off her perfect (not so little) head...

I was worried being so far from home would make me feel even further away from Brooklyn, but I have often felt her near. I feel her in the breeze,  see her in the beautiful purple trees and plants that stick out in the greenery of California, and have even smelled her from time to time. I know that wherever we are, she is always close by.

This trip has been amazing for Derek and I. We have been so blessed by this opportunity.  But in an instant I would give up all beauty the West coast has to offer, and all the fun we have had,  if we could just have our sweet baby girl back. Nothing compares to her beauty and the way she felt in my arms.